A recent polling of mothers in Europe and the United States has gleaned shocking results. It seems 90% of mothers surveyed believe their teenagers illnesses to be largely due to the fact that their phones simply exist. While the other 10% take a more relaxed stance on the issue, saying that all sickness their child may have is because of their constant use of their device.
“The use of electronics has caused my children to be lazy and thus contract Covid.” stated Clementine Amelia-Trent, a mother of 3 adolescents ages 13, 15,and 17, in an interview early last week. “At first I thought it might be because they visited their sick and highly contagious cousin in the hospital, but after looking into it I discovered that it’s most likely because they spend more than 2 hours on their phones every day.” She then added “This is such a horrible turn of events and I will definitely take away their phones ASAP. If they want to get new ones when they’re older and harm their bodies that’s their own individual desicion. Luckily, I have my lavender essential oil so I believe we’ll all be ok.”
At publishing time, she noted that her sister in Wyoming was calling and she needed to set up a 3 hour appointment to talk to her.