PoliSauce Job List: Fast Food

Do you need a job, but don’t know what environment you would fit into? Search no more. We at PoliSauce are proud to help our community by giving you some ideas, based on your unique personality and/or life choices. Today’s Job List is Fast Food.

McDonalds: If you want an easily acquired job, this is the place for you. Mcdonalds will accept almost any application, however, there are a few requirements. You must be willing, and almost eager, to work in your pajamas. This is meant to give a relaxed feel to the customers, as well as making sure you get to work on time, due to the fact that you don’t have to get changed.

Taco Bell: This is tricky, as there are several requirements. You must be willing to ruin your life in order to work here. However, as this is a very prestigious establishment, many people do. You must have a tattoo or a piercing in a place other than your ear. You must also be either REALLY irritated, at all hours of the day, or lackadaisical. This will, of course, change your life, but so will eating there.

Burger King: If you are gay or liberal, this is a place that will accept you. They live up to their slogan “Have It Your Way” and show it through their employees. If you are a Christian or Conservative, walk away….the next one is for you.

Chick-Fil-A: Christians, Conservatives, and Homeschoolers unite! This classy, yet bigoted place is a haven for people like you. The main requirement here is the ability to say “My Pleasure” a couple hundred times a day.

Wendy’s: Here is the final destination for those who don’t like conflict, and also those who like chili and/or a large variety of soda.

Now you are set! Go show off your skills! Just remember to always complain about minimum wage. Unless, of course, you work at Bigot Chicken Inc.

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